Lindsay Lohan said that she is determined to start afresh
Los Angeles:
In her first interview since herlatest rehab stint, Lindsay Lohan admitted to Oprah Winfreythat she lied about her cocaine use but the troubled actresssaid she is now determined to start afresh.
Lohan, 27, has previously stated that she used the drugthree or four times, she told Winfrey on her network OWN thatthe actual number is more like 10-15 times, the HollywoodReporter said.
"I was terrified of being judged," she said, adding thatshe snorted the drug but never injected herself with it.
"I'm an addict," Lohan said but insisted that heraddiction is to alcohol. "That, in the past, was a gateway toother things for me. I tried cocaine with alcohol."
Lohan, who has been branded the problem child in Hollywoodfor her legal troubles and wild lifestyle, claimed she did notenjoy using cocaine.
"I never felt good the next day." But she took it becauseit allowed her to drink more. "It was a party thing. Peoplewould have it, and I'd do it."
The Meangirls star was terrified when she first foundout about her jail trip.
"Having all the chaos around me that I was so comfortablewith, I somewhere inside knew I wanted to go to jail. And Ithink that that was subconsciously being put out there just bymy actions, or lack thereof," Lohan said.
Asked if she is "addicted to chaos," Lohan replied: "Ithink so. Yeah, it was a comfortable choice to me. What waschaotic to other people in the outside looking in was normal.
There is something to be said about me learning to becomfortable with things just being OK."
Lohan said she has become more responsible and would liketo get her life back on track.
"(I'm ready) to get the thing that has made me happiest mywhole life back, which is to work really hard, stay focusedand prove myself. I have to regain trust in people, in mycareer, that had doubts, and I fully respect that on theirbehalf... I am my own worst enemy, and I know that."
Lohan, 27, has previously stated that she used the drugthree or four times, she told Winfrey on her network OWN thatthe actual number is more like 10-15 times, the HollywoodReporter said.
"I was terrified of being judged," she said, adding thatshe snorted the drug but never injected herself with it.
"I'm an addict," Lohan said but insisted that heraddiction is to alcohol. "That, in the past, was a gateway toother things for me. I tried cocaine with alcohol."
Lohan, who has been branded the problem child in Hollywoodfor her legal troubles and wild lifestyle, claimed she did notenjoy using cocaine.
"I never felt good the next day." But she took it becauseit allowed her to drink more. "It was a party thing. Peoplewould have it, and I'd do it."
The Meangirls star was terrified when she first foundout about her jail trip.
"Having all the chaos around me that I was so comfortablewith, I somewhere inside knew I wanted to go to jail. And Ithink that that was subconsciously being put out there just bymy actions, or lack thereof," Lohan said.
Asked if she is "addicted to chaos," Lohan replied: "Ithink so. Yeah, it was a comfortable choice to me. What waschaotic to other people in the outside looking in was normal.
There is something to be said about me learning to becomfortable with things just being OK."
Lohan said she has become more responsible and would liketo get her life back on track.
"(I'm ready) to get the thing that has made me happiest mywhole life back, which is to work really hard, stay focusedand prove myself. I have to regain trust in people, in mycareer, that had doubts, and I fully respect that on theirbehalf... I am my own worst enemy, and I know that."
