Have you ever felt people poking at your calm? Imagine kids teasing a sleeping dog with a stick just to see if it growls. And if the dog attacks, the poor animal is deemed at fault, as if its reaction wasn't provoked. We face similar occurrences sometimes. People at work, your colleagues and sometimes even your close ones test your patience, nudging your boundaries. The after-effect of their actions is your explosive reaction. But, at such times, these people act surprised, painting you in a bad light.
If you ever faced such a situation then you are not alone. But what's important is understanding why people behave in a certain way and how you can restore your calm without hampering your peace. Helping you in the process is Integrative Lifestyle expert Luke Coutinho. According to him, “navigating through difficult emotions is required for peace and harmony at a cellular level.” His latest Instagram entry is all about that.
Luke Coutinho writes, “Some people, bosses or partners will provoke you until they bring out your ugly side. Then they play the victim when you go there. Over and above cellular nutrition, exercise and sleep, emotional wellness is a key pillar in our practice of integrative and lifestyle medicine.”
Explaining the provoker psychology Luke Coutinho says, “When someone feels threatened, cornered or challenged — whether emotionally or verbally — they may instinctively react to protect themselves. This response can manifest as anger, defensiveness, or aggression which can be perceived by others as an ‘ugly' side. This is a defense mechanism and is different for all.”
When the provoker exerts dominance and power over the victim making them look irrational, the victim reacts inappropriately showing a wide range of negative emotions. Hence builds a never-ending loop.
Here's how to break the cycle
- Awareness and mindfulness
- Honest and direct communication
- Walk away until calm
- Understand the plot by this person (the provoker) and be silent. Communicate later
- Seek help
- Be educated, not influenced
Follow these tips by Luke Coutinho and find peace within yourself.
Disclaimer: This content including advice provides generic information only. It is in no way a substitute for a qualified medical opinion. Always consult a specialist or your own doctor for more information. NDTV does not claim responsibility for this information.
