The Heart Of Care: Caring For Those Who Care

"Care work, both paid and unpaid, is at the heart of humanity and our societies." And while several countries have or are working towards the formalising care giving work, even including in calculation of GDP, an aspect that remains more personal, and largely uncharted, is care for care givers. Whether in a professional or personal capacity, as subordinate or senior, as a parent or ward, almost all of us multitask in our care giving roles. While ensuring others' cups are filled throughout, caregivers often forget to fill their own.

Some broad areas which may be helpful are

1. Self-check-in

At the beginning of the day, ask yourself “How am I feeling today?” While most may feel that there isn't a provision, it really is ok to not feel 100% ok every single day.  Rather than judging oneself harshly, it is better to be objective about you are and your ability to be a provider and prepare yourself accordingly. Incorporating meditation and mindfulness into your routine can help reduce stress and provide emotional comfort.

2. Establish routines

Discipline and consistency are key to a successful outcome in any care giving work. Previously set out and clearly communicated plan of action is of the easiest way to organise one's time to optimise desirability and behaviour. These could include meals, rest time, medication, work, and even bedtime routines. Consistently re-enforcing the same encourages receptivity the body and mind to respond to this predictability.

3. Make time to do things you love

Remember the countless hours you spent painting or playing sport as a child? Just the thought of it may have brought smile to your face, along with a picture in your mind of your happy self then. While the current fast-paced urban lifestyle leaves little room for unscheduled pit stops, its always a good idea to find a bit of time during the week to do things you love – a childhood or a new hobby, coffee and an openhearted chat with an old friend, trying a new recipe. You may also introduce it to cared for be it child or parent, and may serve as a wonderful way to bond, surpassing the usual transactional relationship based on deliverables.

4. Seek support

Care givers are usually the first point of counsel and support. But the first doesn't necessarily have to be the ‘only one'. A popular African proverb which says – “It takes a village” is reminiscent of the good old days of the Indian joint family system where everybody's needs were, at some of time, met by someone or the other in the family, irrespective of daily differences and dynamics. Just as support for medical needs are easily identifiable and usually addressed, care giving needs beyond the purview of medical doctors are often overlooked or taken on by one person, along with the mental emotional well-being, which may leave the care giver overburdened. Seeking appropriate help at the right time and delegating to the right people (whether paid or unpaid) can be a huge support to the care giver. Especially if the care giver is unable to remain available for non-care associated tasks, getting adequate support can bring about a huge relief without compromising needs of either.

5. Practice detachment

If involved over a prolonged period of time, care givers often find it tough to detach mentally and emotionally even when they are not physically around. A battery which is constantly running risks being discharged quicker. You may sow the seed, but the fruits will only ripen at their own time. You cannot and should not be responsible for everyone and everything, all the time. Accepting this thought itself can bring about a sense of acceptance and peace. As famously penned by the Beatles, “And when the night is cloudy there is still a light that shines on me, Shinin' until tomorrow, let it be”

“Care work, both paid and unpaid, is at the heart of humanity and our societies”. And while several countries have or are working towards the formalizing care giving work, even including in calculation of GDP, there remains a crucial, deeply personal element that often goes overlooked—caring for the caregivers themselves.

Caregivers, whether working in a professional capacity or providing care informally, bear an immense load. It doesn't matter if they are a senior professional overseeing a team, a parent nurturing their child, or someone caring for an elder family member—the common thread is the juggling of multiple responsibilities. Almost all of us, at some point, wear the hat of a caregiver, multitasking and ensuring that the needs of those in our care are met. However, in the process of tending to others, caregivers often neglect their own well-being, leaving their own emotional, mental, and physical "cups" drained.

It's important to recognize that caregiving is a both fulfilling and exhausting process and to truly sustain the role, one must take time to recharge.

Here is a daily checklist to help caregivers recharge themselves:

a. Practicing yoga, mindfulness or meditation

Incorporating a yoga and/or meditation and mindfulness into the routine can help reduce stress and provide emotional comfort. It centre's one mind ready to face adverse people and situations, also providing clarity of thought in decision making

b. Exercise regularly

Physical activity is one of the best ways to release happy hormones and boost energy levels. Any form of exercise which is practiced consistently will help improve both your physical and mental well-being. This can be integrated with yoga, walks, swimming, cycling, aerobics or simple dancing. 

c. Eat a healthy diet

Eating well balanced nutritious meals is essential for maintaining energy and resilience. Proper nutrition helps ones stay focused and mentally alert during long days of caregiving. As we grow older, our body needs change and it might help to seek advice from a professional nutritionist for some tips and guidelines to customise as per your body requirements.

d. Take breaks

Allow yourself regular breaks through the day even if they are brief moments of rest, having coffee, talking to a loved one, picking up a magazine to browse - all this can be refreshing for the mind and body. Exercising during a break can achieve two birds with one stone.

e. Get enough sleep

Research has shown that adequate sleep is critical for both mental and your physical health. A restful night ensures a productive day. In our world with OTT options mushrooming everyday, the need for prioritising a full night's sleep cannot be emphasised enough!

Content by: Prittha Jain, Educationist

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