Parenting is a huge responsibility that becomes considerably more difficult when you are the sole caregiver for your child. As a single parent, one has to fulfil the roles of both father and mother, ensuring that the child has all they need. Here's a story that will undoubtedly make you happy. It's about Col Sanjay Pande (Retd), who, in the absence of his wife, took on the task of caring for his pregnant daughter hundreds of miles away. The retired officer shared his story through a thread on Twitter.
A year after his wife died, his daughter informed him that she was pregnant. However, as a single father, he felt he had no idea what kind of care a woman required during pregnancy, and felt that he would have been the "most useless guy around”. But then he said, he was “a fighter”.
1. My wife passed away and a year plus later my daughter informed me that I was going to be a grand dad soon. Traditionally, I, father, as lone surviving parent, would have been most useless guy around in pregnancy days, post pregnancy period, baby's growth etc. I was a fighter.
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
So, he decided to be his daughter's "mother".
"Right from the day she informed me, I planned her traditional diet, learnt by researching through nights, YouTube, elders, books and everything I could lay my hands on. The first batch of laddus for 30 days was ready," he wrote.
However, there was one problem: distance. His daughter lived in the UK while he was in Delhi.
2. I decided to be my daughters ‘mother'. Right from the day she informed me, I planned her traditional diet, learnt by researching through nights, YouTube, elders, books and everything I could lay my hands on. The FIRST batch of laddus for 30 days was ready. Problem? Delhi & UK!
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
So, what did he do? Before sending the laddoos to the UK, he vacuum-sealed and froze them for 96 hours.
"The first lot saved my daughter's life since she was eating nothing. 15 days later, the second different type of laddus were made and frozen. 21st day dispatched!" he wrote.
3. Vaccum packing machine, food grade plastics, freezing laddus for 96 hrs, packing as sending them by parcel to UK!!! The first lot saved my daughters life since she was eating nothing. 15 days later the second different type of laddus were made and frozen. 21st day dispatched!
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
That's how the "cycle started".
"Every type of healthy and nutritious food that a traditional Indian mother would give to her daughter, was made by me personally. Hygiene, calculation of nutrients, calories, weight of laddus, storing technique, etc. all were meticulously written down," he tweeted.
4. The cycle started. Every type of healthy & nutritious food that a traditional Indian mother would give to her daughter, was made by me personally. Hygiene, calculation of nutrients, calories, weight of laddus, storing technique etc. all were meticulously written down.
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
Because of COVID-19, he couldn't travel to the UK. So, the retired colonel ensured that his daughter got everything in the UK that "she would have got here" in India.
But then there was another challenge ahead of him: "What to feed her post-pregnancy?"
5. Eighth month, Seventh, Sixth, Fifth, Fourth, Third, Second and the month of due date. I fed her nutrients from here. CoVID did not permit travel. All eight months she was fed in UK what she would have got here. Now my challenge in July was WHAT to feed her post-pregnancy?
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
He got down to researching foods and superfoods that help in lactation or increase milk etc. He gathered the ingredients and sent them to her again. Finally, when he could, the retired colonel travelled to the UK to be with his daughter where he made the food "in bulk".
6. Again research, foods & super foods helping in lactation or increasing milk etc was studied and the first lot was dispatched in August. It continued for each month. I visited UK and made in bulk. Whether it was Garden Cress, Edible Gum, Methi, Shatawari or many such things,
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
He says, he "became master."
"Mixing ingredients, balancing calories and seeing the effect with own eyes. From Jan 19 to date, the flow of this special mother's food was given by me, a father, to my daughter. It continues," he said.
7. I became master. Mixing ingredients, balancing calories and seeing the effect with own eyes. From Jan 19 to date, the flow of this special mothers food was given by me, a father, to my daughter. It continues. It's been a year that the grand kid feeds on my Laddu as start of
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
Now, he has the recipes for over 12 laddoos that he said women require from conception to the time the baby turns a year old. "I feel so proud of myself that I did not let my wife down. My daughter swears by me and refuses to touch anything given by others," he wrote.
8. day. Today I have perfect recipes of more than 12 laddus that women require from conception to the baby crossing a year of age. I feel so proud of myself that I did not let my wife down. My daughter swears by me and refuses to touch anything given by others. Interesting?
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
The retired colonel said that whatever he did from January 2019 till now "was anything but my duty." He added that he was amazed at the "response, comments, suggestions and kind words from Twitter friends" on his thread. He ends the thread saying "you all made me cry today."
9. I never realised that what I did from Jan 2019 up to today was anything but my duty. A random thought triggered the thread today. I am amazed at response, comments, suggestions & kind words from Twitter friends. Admitting unashamedly, you all made me cry today. Love you all.
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
His story has tugged at the heartstrings of several people.
One user wrote, "Please share it with many daughters of India who require you. We can organise a fund raiser and start up. A brilliant idea of canning laddus."
Please share it with many daughters of India who require you. We can organise a fund raiser and start up. A brilliant idea of canning laddus .
— Kali Shankar (@kash5205) May 8, 2022
I also had similar problems when my wife was carrying and I was posted to a god forshaken place.
Another user suggested that the retired colonel should "write a book of recipes, reasons, emotions." The user added that not all fathers, and sometimes even mothers, have this kind of talent, patience, and determination.
Please write a book of recipes, reasons, emotions .
— Tejesh Patel (@e_tejesh) May 9, 2022
Not all dad's and at times even mom's are having the skills, persistence and perseverance that you have sir. It will be a wonderful gift to such parents , expecting mother's and to the babies too.
One user also wished him "Happy Mother's Day", because he was the mother to his daughter in his wife's absence.
Actually i wanna wish u Happy Mothers Day ♥️ to u as u ver the Mother to ur daughter in her Absence !!
— Tanisqaa ॐ???????? (@Tanisqa4) May 9, 2022
A fourth user wrote that he had done beyond anything that mothers, husbands, mothers-in-law, sisters or friends would do, and that his daughter was lucky to have such a father.
You have done beyond anything mothers, husbands, mother in laws, sisters or friends do.
— sangeetha (@sangeeetha_) May 8, 2022
Your daughter is lucky to have you.
The thread brought tears to my eyes. Most women reading the thread cannot claim to have received what you so naturally and dutifully did for your daughter.
Let us know what you think of this touching story.
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