On Valentine's Day, 7 Things That Are Better Than Grinding Your Teeth At Social Media Theatrics

You don't have to be single to want to roll your eyes at the needless production that is Valentine's Day. You could be happily in love and still wonder what the point of all the brouhaha, declarations, announcements and pronouncements about love is. As if the Valentine's Day-themed menus, cocktails and special events at restaurants and bars weren't enough, social media turns into a breeding ground for over the top romance and unbearable mushiness (on steroids!). If you're someone who loathes exhibitionism, Valentine's Day can be a truly trying and tiring day to get through. It can fray and frazzle the nerves of the most even-tempered among us, let alone the ones who find it annoying from the get go. But not everyone shares these sentiments. And often, people who don't get what all the fuss is all about and are vocal about it, end up being labelled 'killjoys' or 'The Grinch'. I would know, because I've been there. For practically my entire adult life. As a seasoned hater of all things V-Day related, here's my list of seven tried-and-tested things you can do to keep yourself from judging friends and loved ones making a spectacle of themselves on social media in the name of love. You're welcome.

Go on a day-long digital detox

This is the one day in the year when I whole-heartedly buy into the cliché 'ignorance is bliss'. Go off the grid completely on Valentine's Day for the sake of your sanity. No bubbling sarcasm when your third cousin, twice removed, decides to write a love letter to her one-year-old baby for the world to read. No biting wit when your friend, whose list of grievances with her husband runs longer than the entire A Song Of Ice And Fire series, decides to write a love-filled ode for her 'best friend and partner in crime'. What you don't know will not compel you to react. So, to borrow another marketing cliché, this Valentine's Day, give yourself the gift of social media peace.

Dog-sit for a friend who is out celebrating

No matter how many uncharitable, irritated thoughts spring to your mind every time you see someone close to you say or do silly things on social media to 'celebrate the day of love', puppies have a magical way of making it all a little bit better. Seriously, it's almost impossible to hold on to any kind of mean thoughts with a puppy panting next to your ear, and licking your face till you're wet and grinning. Find a friend who is celebrating and offer to watch their dog, even if they don't require a sitter.

Game night

Childish and petty competitiveness is the perfect antidote to the mushiness of the world. So pull out the board game that brings out the most cut-throat version of you and get cracking. If you're in a relationship and your partner detests Valentine's Day as much as you do, go ahead and make this your own anti V-Day ritual. If not, I'm sure you have at least a couple of friends who share your sentiments about the day.

Netflix and chill

I have two words for you. Black Mirror. Seriously. It will boggle and mess with your mind and give you so much to think about and obsess over, you will have no time to linger on pointless preoccupations such as people's foolishness on social media. If you're a Black Mirror virgin, here's a fantastic rating of all the episodes, from the worst to the best. For Valentine's Day, I would personally recommend 'Be Right Back' and 'The Entire History Of You'.

Celebrate 'Galentine's Day', maybe?

So you don't utterly detest Valentine's Day but have a healthy level of disdain for it? For the moderates among us, a fun but not-cheesy way of getting through the day could be getting together with a bunch of your best girls and having the time of your life. Considering that we've very recently had men show us how much of a problem they have with women laughing and women drinking beer, going all out in the pursuit of fun is a political statement as well. Highly recommended.

Hang out with your mom and grandmom

If the women of your family are as unimpressed by marketing gimmicks like Valentine's Day as mine are, they will love you all the more for choosing to spend the day with themselves in defiance, instead of cosying up to a partner and spending obscene amounts of money on pink and red cocktails. Plus, you'll finally catch up on all the family gossip you've been missing out on.

Go to a comedy show

If there is one group of people that can be counted upon to unfailingly make fun of life's finer emotions, every single time, it is standup comedy artists. Valentine's Day is this lot's Christmas. Gather a group of friends or go alone, because there are few recourses available to us that are as healthy as laughing the fretfulness away.