Man's Note-Taking Method During Fight Fuels Girlfriend's Fury. Internet Offers Advice

In the age of digital communication, relationships often encounter challenges that are unique to the digital realm. One such case recently surfaced on Reddit, where a boyfriend's note-taking method became the epicentre of a storm between him and his girlfriend. As the couple navigates this issue, the internet has offered a plethora of advice and opinions on how to address this seemingly innocuous yet contentious matter.

The man, who goes by the username u/ShelterAppropriate on Reddit, revealed that every time he and his girlfriends get into an argument, he feels "awfully misrepresented". He said, "Then I bring up how my position was misrepresented and I start to get a feeling like I'm being gaslit by my gf that I am the one misremembering/misquoting. I hate being misrepresented and I hate it when during a fight my GF oversimplifies what led to a fight, or omits parts of what happened to make me look worse."

Sharing an incident on the platform, the man wrote, "So a couple nights ago when we got into a fight I went to my room, grabbed a pen and a notebook and asked my GF to tell me her side of the story. I promised to not interrupt. She was confused as to why I have a pen with a notebook, but I told her to ignore it.

She started to tell me her side of the story, I started my note-taking. At first she questioned whether or not I'm even paying attention (she assumed I was doodling), I assured her that's not the case."

He revealed that his girlfriend found his note-taking method irksome, leading to a heated exchange between the couple.

See the post here:

AITA for transcribing my girlfriend's arguments during a fight in a notebook?
byu/ShelterAppropriate inAmItheAsshole

The post has received around 825 upvotes and an array of comments. Many users empathized with the man and advised him to end things with his girlfriend as she was "red flag". 

"As someone who grew up with a gaslighting dad, I also started to take notes of what he would say so that he couldn't claim that he didn't say whatever it was. I've been told this is a common thing that victims of gaslighting do," a user wrote.

"And I'll add that if you feel that you need to take notes to keep hold of what you know to be true, that she is twisting the truth to downplay how you're being affected (i.e. gaslit), then it may be time to reconsider the relationship entirely. This isn't healthy," another user commented.

"This is not a healthy dynamic. You don't feel heard and she won't allow you to be heard. Reevaluate if this is something you can deal with constantly, it'll probably just get worse," the third user wrote.

"Why do this? Why not just split up? You don't like each other and you're both fighting to win and and not to solve. It's making you weird (this is deeply weird and extreme behaviour) and it's making her hostile and possibly dishonest. Why stay together unless you both have now developed a taste for mutual psychological torture? End it," the fourth user commented.

"This is not a healthy relationship. break up and move on," the fifth user wrote.