Amsterdam-based Nadia with her daughter Insiya.
Not all love stories end in a happily ever after. This Amsterdam-based woman's became an endless nightmare.
In a five-part post shared on the Humans of Amsterdam page on the weekend, Nadia talks about her marriage to an abusive man who allegedly kidnapped their two-year-old daughter and took her to Mumbai after their divorce. She has been fighting to get her daughter back since.
"The day we got married everything changed," says Nadia on Facebook.
Before that, she says, "he made me feel special and he kept putting me on a pedestal."
The two were married in 2011 and that's when things changed for them. The loving boyfriend morphed into a dominant husband. "Before we got married he would tell me I was beautiful and give me compliments but once we were married he told me I dressed terribly and slowly started tarring down my confidence," she says.
Since he was an Indian businessman, the two would have to travel to Mumbai frequently. This, among other things, affected their relationship. The situation worsened when they had their first child, a daughter named Insiya, after three years of marriage.
"When I gave birth to Insiya, he left after four days and he left me alone with the baby. 6 weeks after our daughter was born the traveling back and forth started again but it was almost impossible. Traveling with a newborn is exhausting and by the time she was 6 months old we had traveled to India over 6 times," she says.
Nadia says her husband never helped with their daughter. "I felt like a single mother in a marriage," she says. He had also become abusive and physically violent but Nadia didn't tell anyone.
"Every time he would be abusive he would tell me the next day that he was sorry and that it was all his fault. He promised me he would change. He would say that I was a better person than he was and that is why I would be able to forgive him. I still wanted to believe in our fairy tale and so I kept giving him chances, but a man who beats you once will beat you again," she says.
Nadia filed for divorce but never stopped her husband from meeting their daughter and wanted him to be a part of Insiya's life.
"One day he came over and while she was sitting on his lap he said he would send his friends over to have me killed. I walked up to him and took Insiya and ran to the police station to file a complaint," she says. The threats didn't stop. Nadia even found a GPS track and trace device under her car. The police attached an AWARE system to her body so could be reached as soon as possible in an emergency.
"In the following months we were in heavy lawsuits but meanwhile I kept finding track and trace devices under my car. He kept losing the lawsuits and the judge decided that I become the primary and legal custodian of our daughter. It damaged his ego and as a response he started telling people that I was mistreating our daughter. I was scared all the time. His goal was to destroy me," she says.
Things became calm for a while but Nadia's worst fear came true on September 29. She left Insiya with her mother and was driving on the highway when she got a call from her nephew saying some men had taken away her daughter.
"Ever since that day my life has been a complete nightmare. In life sometimes you have a bad day but then you go to sleep and there is a new day waiting for you. For me this bad nightmare isn't ending," she says.
Nadia found out her ex-husband had taken Insiya to Germany and then to India. "I haven't talked to my daughter since she has been kidnapped. Despite my countless efforts, he will not let me talk to my 2-year-old daughter," she says.
Nadia is now trying her best to find her daughter and take her home. "Together with the Ministry of Foreign Affairs and the Dutch government we are trying our utmost best to get Insiya back. Every day from morning until night I am working on this. I will not stop until I can hold my daughter again..." she says.
Read her story below:
In a five-part post shared on the Humans of Amsterdam page on the weekend, Nadia talks about her marriage to an abusive man who allegedly kidnapped their two-year-old daughter and took her to Mumbai after their divorce. She has been fighting to get her daughter back since.
"The day we got married everything changed," says Nadia on Facebook.
Before that, she says, "he made me feel special and he kept putting me on a pedestal."
The two were married in 2011 and that's when things changed for them. The loving boyfriend morphed into a dominant husband. "Before we got married he would tell me I was beautiful and give me compliments but once we were married he told me I dressed terribly and slowly started tarring down my confidence," she says.
Since he was an Indian businessman, the two would have to travel to Mumbai frequently. This, among other things, affected their relationship. The situation worsened when they had their first child, a daughter named Insiya, after three years of marriage.
"When I gave birth to Insiya, he left after four days and he left me alone with the baby. 6 weeks after our daughter was born the traveling back and forth started again but it was almost impossible. Traveling with a newborn is exhausting and by the time she was 6 months old we had traveled to India over 6 times," she says.
Nadia says her husband never helped with their daughter. "I felt like a single mother in a marriage," she says. He had also become abusive and physically violent but Nadia didn't tell anyone.
"Every time he would be abusive he would tell me the next day that he was sorry and that it was all his fault. He promised me he would change. He would say that I was a better person than he was and that is why I would be able to forgive him. I still wanted to believe in our fairy tale and so I kept giving him chances, but a man who beats you once will beat you again," she says.
Nadia filed for divorce but never stopped her husband from meeting their daughter and wanted him to be a part of Insiya's life.
"One day he came over and while she was sitting on his lap he said he would send his friends over to have me killed. I walked up to him and took Insiya and ran to the police station to file a complaint," she says. The threats didn't stop. Nadia even found a GPS track and trace device under her car. The police attached an AWARE system to her body so could be reached as soon as possible in an emergency.
"In the following months we were in heavy lawsuits but meanwhile I kept finding track and trace devices under my car. He kept losing the lawsuits and the judge decided that I become the primary and legal custodian of our daughter. It damaged his ego and as a response he started telling people that I was mistreating our daughter. I was scared all the time. His goal was to destroy me," she says.
Things became calm for a while but Nadia's worst fear came true on September 29. She left Insiya with her mother and was driving on the highway when she got a call from her nephew saying some men had taken away her daughter.
"Ever since that day my life has been a complete nightmare. In life sometimes you have a bad day but then you go to sleep and there is a new day waiting for you. For me this bad nightmare isn't ending," she says.
Nadia found out her ex-husband had taken Insiya to Germany and then to India. "I haven't talked to my daughter since she has been kidnapped. Despite my countless efforts, he will not let me talk to my 2-year-old daughter," she says.
Nadia is now trying her best to find her daughter and take her home. "Together with the Ministry of Foreign Affairs and the Dutch government we are trying our utmost best to get Insiya back. Every day from morning until night I am working on this. I will not stop until I can hold my daughter again..." she says.
Read her story below:
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