Twitterati Confess Dumbest Lies They Ever Told (It's An Enthralling Read)

When comedian Eliza Skinner asked her followers about the dumbest lies they have ever told, we got a treasure trove of hilarious responses. Lying takes craftiness and skill, a manipulative mind and a remorseless conscience -things that clearly none of these responders possessed. We compiled the best 'dumb lies' as confessed on Twitter- some borne of desperation, some completely unnecessary, but all equally hilarious.
 

What's the dumbest lie you've told?

- Eliza Skinner (@elizaskinner) June 17, 2018

Eliza started off by confessing her own dumb lie:
 

I told a Lyft driver I was a writer and when he pressed further I said I wrote "Sci fi Short stories." He said "whoa, not much of a market for that. Where do you publish them?" "Magazines, mostly". I felt like I was on fire the whole time.

- Eliza Skinner (@elizaskinner) June 17, 2018

And others soon joined in

LOL
 

I used to tell my teachers I hadn't peed my pants when I had clearly peed my pants

- Emily Heller (@MrEmilyHeller) June 17, 2018

The level of dedication though...
 

When I was in 3rd grade I thought having glasses was REALLY cool. I told my mom I was having trouble seeing. She set an appt with the optometrist and I purposefully said all of the wrong letters during the test.

- Steven Lucas (@stevenclucas) June 17, 2018

Every student will relate
 

Ma'am I did the homework but I forgot the notebook at home... #StudentOfTheGame #School

- Nayeem Iqbal (@nayeemiqbal_) June 17, 2018

Uh oh
 

I was 17 years old on a cruise ship spitting game to a girl. I told her my name was Sebastian and was an only child. My identical twin walks up and and says what's up Cody... she just looked at us https://t.co/tsaS21ehFC

- Cody Lowe (@codylowe88) June 17, 2018

Who hasn't lied to their siblings?
 

I told my sister I have access to fairy world and if she would refuse to do my work I'll not take her around and will ask my fairy friends to make a mouse out of her. https://t.co/qUE8MyQOnW

- Nikita Dhirwani (@niQuieta) June 18, 2018

Allergic to... brown?
 

I went to a birthday party when I was 5- the girl had horses to ride. I was scared of the horses but didn't want people thinking I was a wimp and since all the horses were brown, I told everyone that unfortunately I was allergic to the color brown. https://t.co/7dUAtTh1i5

- sarah avery vise (@sarahaveryvise) June 17, 2018

Bargaining level 1000
 

A shopkeeper while street shopping asked me if I am an TV actress and I said Yes to get more discount #lieswetell

- J (@Khusshiiii) June 17, 2018

*Cringe*
 

I was 22-ish outside a bar. Told a guy I went to grade school with that I wasn't me but my name is Kyle. Trip down memory lane avoided. Then tried to walk into the bar and he said he needed to see my ID. He was the bouncer. https://t.co/xuUypGeOlA

- Zach Harper (@talkhoops) June 17, 2018

Aww
 

In 3rd grade we did a project on planets, Saturn was my absolute favorite. When I didn't get assigned Saturn I went to my teacher and said "my grandpa was the first person to fly to Saturn" in an attempt to persuade her to give me Saturn.

She didn't give me Saturn. I cried https://t.co/P99xMEoMDB

- Troy (@MangyMalamute) June 17, 2018

We would also lie about having a pet lion
 

In 2nd grade, I told my teacher I had a pet lion. She had been to my house and knew that I, in fact, did not have a pet lion. https://t.co/X2pK0koVFJ

- Chris Wilks (@TheRealWhigs) June 17, 2018

What is the dumbest lie that you have ever told? Do let us know using the comments section below.